"Stop Being A Chicken"

I have to be honest and say that I have absolutely no desire to eat anything from the guy on the street corner selling food from a cart. I don't care how hard my friends try to convince me that “it's amazing”or that “he makes the best chicken in town.” I'm the guy who doesn't like eating the trail mix out of the public bowl at a bar, what in the hell makes you think I want to eat poultry from a guy in a tent next to an adult book store? There is a guy in our neighborhood that literally drives around selling taco's out of his van. His VAN! How do I know he's not some pervert that preys on adults but instead of candy to lure me in he uses chorizo? Now obviously that's a stretch but as a child you get it drilled into your head not to talk to strangers and to inspect your candy thoroughly at Halloween, so now as an adult it's difficult to go against that and purchase cuisine out of a Chevy. The guy on my block that sells food on the corner has no health inspection sticker, no sink, no “employees must wash hands before returning to work" sign and still people line up to buy bags of chicken sandwiches out of his ice chest. Here's the thing, it's probably delicious but I'm such a nut that in my head he went out and found a street corner, bought a tent, assembled it, paid off the cops, found a chicken, killed it, cooked it, poisoned it, and has been waiting for me ever since. No thank you sir. I prefer to get food poisoning the old fashion way.. by eating Taco Bell at 3am.